Hey! Shut that door!

What?! Huh?! Oh hi! You caught me on the toilet. Pfft, don't worry now, it's only words, you can't see anything unless I vividly describe it for you and who needs that when you have you're own imagination. C'mon now folks, lets try and imagine me on the toilet. Are you there? Can you smell it? Well then, I guess it's not me that needs help, I'm just suggesting some stuff, you're the sick buggers thinking about it. Now lets get this bog on the road.

A catchup
It's been a good few busy weeks here in my reality (the giant Bees!!). I've been quite busy doing lots of stuff like acting in a spec tv commercial which I hope to be able to show you all soon. Finishing off this website was a better thing to do than not and getting all sorts of product up for people to buy from my online shop will help bring the North Koreans back to the negotiation table.

I'm itching to get back into the `My Hamster' cartoon. But lots of other things have been popping up in the meanwhilst, like prepping the next Groovin' the Moo down in Narandarah in October. It looks like Grinspoon and Spiderbait are a lock-in for that day so if you live down around that way...and why shouldn't you. Well tell your folks to sell that last starving sheep so you can go along. How much does a sheep bring these days I wonder? naah, make it two just to be safe.

What not to see
If you are ever visiting your local DVD rental place or are lucky enough to have a plate in your head that picks up pay per view, I can heartlily recommend missing Oliver Stones latest movie Alexander. I had a read a couple of years ago of Valerio Massimo Manfredi's three novels about Alexander the Great and really enjoyed them. The story of Alexander is quite an epic one of a leader years ahead of his time and lots of nudy prod games with all sorts of people.

This movie...I think it's time Oliver Stone layed off the mull (I'm such a hypocrite). He's taken an amazing story and turned it into a incomprehenible muddle of scenes that end nowhere and make you feel nothing, not even unintentional laughs from a stoned Stone (hows that for mixed metaphors?). This has to be one of the worst movies ever made.

Please come back Baz!
The time is right for Baz Lurman to make his version. I've always reckoned Baz, who previously made Strictly Ballroom, Romeo + Juliet and Moulin Rouge would make the most amazing version of this story. From what I've been reading he wants to make it as part of a trilogy of films reinventing the `Epic' genre of film. Currently he's put Alexander on the shelf to concentrate on an epic, `Gone with the Wind' style thing but set in ye olde Australia with Big Russel Crowe and purdy Nicole Kidman.

I hope he doesn't do another thematic remake of La Boheme again though. C'mon Baz, there are other love stories, they don't all have to be tragic! Or the same bloody story but told a bit differently (do you really think Channel were that happy with the commercial he made for them?). Well, It's time to go. I've got giant Bees to ride.